Thirty dollars poorer with a tub of overbuttered popcorn nestled between my knees and a half gallon of Mr Pibb in my left hand, I reclined in the bubblegum stained folding chairs of Atlantic Station theatre to enjoy the end of what was to be one of the most riviting and explosive trilogys ever to grace the big screen. What unfolded before me can easily be compared to having being hit by a train on my birthday, my mangled body being robbed of all its money and valuables to help support Naziism, having to share a hospital room with Anomonous Guy, my parents telling me not only was I illegitamite-but also adopted from Circus folk, the preacher who visits the hospital telling me I'm going to Hell, but somehow pulling through only to live my remaining days haunted by how horrible the Matrix:Revolutions really was.
Maybe that was an overstatement, but I'm not one to exxagerate right? Most of the movie is set in the "Real World" which means fast paced fight scenes and stylish attire replaced by about an hour's worth of weak dialogue and those nifty potato-sack inspired outfits everyone loves to see.(that my friends is sarcasim) The battle against Zion was so overly dramatic and poorly organized that it seemed downright boring and the final battle with Agent Smith and Neo would have been more fitting in a Dragonball Z episode. The special effects were overdone and the ending was so predictable that I was more interested in getting circulation back in my butt and legs from the uncomfortable chair I was in then seeing the rest of the movie.
I was not impressed with the second Matrix movie when I first saw it, but after watching the third, the second one was pure Masterpiece...My God man, it even makes the Video Game better! (and thats a miracle in itself) So I left the theatre depressed, unsatisfied and hoping the first Matrix was coming on TBS that night. (atleast its still great, even if it is edited for TV) The only thing I liked about Revolutions was the music during the final fight and chances are in won't be on the soundtrack.
Our only solace? Well atleast its finally over.
